And now that seems a distant memory.  My Grandma, my favorite person in the whole world, is dying.  She’s had a lot of health struggles these past few years, but this leukemia is not one that she’ll be able to come back from.  The doctors now give her 2-4 weeks at best, but she could pass any day now.

I’m grateful for the last moments I had with my sweet cat, and extremely grateful for the days I’m having with my Grandma now.  I know that not everyone gets the kind of time with their loved ones as me and my family have gotten.  And I am glad that she is now in such a great atmosphere with such amazing people taking care of her.  Every day now is both wonderful and difficult.  I get to see and experience all of the love in my family, but I also get to feel my heart breaking and see the pain written on everyone’s face when they know she’s not looking.

And nothing makes me happier than being with her and the rest of my family right now.  I am seeing new sides to members of my family and to relationships within my family.  And how can I not feel joy when I see how much love my family has for each other?

So for now, my only priority is my family.  I have already cancelled a trip I was looking forward to, and dropped almost everything.  I go to work when I’m scheduled, and I’m with my family for the rest of the time.  I need to support everyone as much as I can in this difficult time.  I’m the kind of person who will take on as much of a struggle as I can, if I can possibly take some of the load off of someone else.  I’ll deal with my own load of the struggle when I have time to myself again.  Just bear with me until I can come back and write some more.

Usually I leave the home decor blogging to my interior designer roommate, but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to share a piece of ‘book decor’ with all of you.  While browsing some Target decor, I found these:

These boxes (that appear to be books) remind me of when people would hollow out books to hide valuables and secret belongings in.  I personally never liked the idea of hollowing out books – because you would have to destroy a precious book to do it!  These book boxes seem to be the perfect compromise.

Now usually I wouldn’t be the one to recommend fake books as decoration, since I would rather decorate with my many real books.  But I love these boxes that look like books!  I think it’s a unique way to store some valuables or objects you don’t have another place for.  You could even pile them in with some real books and let whatever you’re keeping in them be hidden in plain sight!  What can I say?  I’m of the belief that you can never have too many books in your home, and I’m branching out to include these book boxes in that statement.

Ask Again Later is a novel about a woman named Emily Rhode, whose mother finds out she has breast cancer.  Instead of continuing her own life, Emily drops everything to return to her mother’s home and take care of her.  She quits her job, leaves her on and off again boyfriend, and returns to her childhood home.  At first it might seem like a selfless act, but Emily had been looking for away to escape the reality of her life.  Between her overdramatic mother, a self-involved sister, and a father she didn’t have a real relationship with, Emily’s escape to her past gives her more than she expected.

My only real problem with her novel came in the beginning.  There were some interesting or funny moments at first, but the novel didn’t draw me in right away.  I put it down after the first 20 or 30 pages and didn’t pick it up for another two days.  I think that the beginning may have suffered because Davis used the same style throughout.  Usually that would be good, but I’ll explain why it might not be here.  The novel is divided into mini “chapters”, each only a page or a couple pages long.  They mini chapters move quickly between topics at time and use humor often, because they are following the narrator Emily’s thoughts.  I thought that this style worked well later in the novel, after you understood the character Emily better, but for those first 20 or 30 pages were confusing or distracting at times.  The quick change of topics especially made it a little more difficult to get drawn into the novel early, because I was too busy trying to keep track of what was going on.

But, I wouldn’t let that deter you.  If you get slowed down in the beginning, like I did, just keep reading.  Because once I got up toward page 50, and especially past there, I couldn’t put the book down.  There was some great humor, and surprising depth.  By the end of the novel I had both laughed and cried.  I don’t want to spoil the novel for anyone who might read it, but I would definitely recommend it.  It’s a quick read once you get into it, with interesting and hilarious characters.  And if you’re not quite sold on the book yet, a portion of the proceeds from the book are donated to two breast cancer organizations.

Read it.  As long as you can appreciate humor, even in the darkest times, I think you’ll enjoy it.  And If you read it and are disappointed after all, I’d be more than willing to discuss why I wasn’t!

This is the first section I wrote for my Eyes Must Match story which I posted the intro for in my first blog post.  I’d love to hear what any of you think

While Stephan gathered up his only real belongings – a small picture frame, a black knife, a gray scarf, and a locked black box – and shoved them into a bag, he could feel the scowl deepening on his face.  He packed up those same four things every day, knowing that he might never return to his apartment once he left it.

Pushing that thought out of his mind, he swung the bag over his shoulder and hurried out of his apartment.  But, as soon as he reached the street, he could feel the eyes on him.  People watched from their windows, from dark alleys, and even from a few feet away.  Of course, if his eyes ever looked anywhere near theirs, they would panic and quickly look somewhere else.

It wasn’t as if Stephan stood out because of his appearance.  He had deep red-violet eyes and hair, and a strong, muscular build.  His hair was many lengths, but all seemed to come forward toward his face, as if asking people to look there.  His features were hard and masculine, especially his sharp nose and strong, wide jaw.  The only softness of his face lay deep within his eyes, but was usually covered by a fiery intensity.  Each day he wore similar clothes – tight, usually black, with a deep v in the front to show off his well-muscled chest.  But, the townspeople’s stares were not because of Stephan’s striking good looks, and every day he wondered if they would always watch him the way they did now.

Today Stephan wasn’t in the mood to even indulge the people staring with one of his dark looks.  Instead he hurried through crowds of people, while forcing himself to walk quickly instead of running as his body ached to.  A sprint always calmed Stephan down somehow, or at least calmed him as much as he could be anymore.  He thought it was probably because he felt safer moving quickly and not letting anyone near him for more than a few seconds.  But he also knew that running down a crowded street only drew more attention to him, and he needed to reach the palace before someone warned them of his arrival.

Just as he had hoped, Stephan slipped inside the palace garden gates without being noticed.  He knew exactly when the guards changed, and which paths to take to avoid them.  Soon he was deep inside the gardens, and stepped out into the center of the courtyard.  A guard recognized him immediately, and Stephan could almost see his exasperation enter his body.  His large shoulders, covered by armor and fine golden silk, dropped heavily as he rose to his feet.

Lately, those were the reactions Stephan got from the guards.  No one took him seriously anymore.  The most he got was an annoyed sigh, an eye roll, or a deep frown at best.  Furious that the guard looked half ready to ignore him and leave the courtyard, Stephan leapt up onto the edge of the fountain and tugged out his knife.

While the guard paused and watched, Stephan began to carve letters into the rounded breasts of the statue at the center of the fountain.  As the guard finally realized what he was doing, he ran out toward Stephan, shouting for the other guards.

Soon Stephan was surrounded, but he continued to carve into the female statue.  It wasn’t until a guard grabbed his leg that he dropped his knife back into his bag and hopped back down to the ground.  Two guards grabbed him roughly by the arms, and then looked up to see the damage he had done.

Across the stone breasts of the fountain statue, Stephan had written “We are all natural.”  One of the guards behind him struck him in the back of the head, but not hard enough to knock him unconscious.

“You’re a fool, Stephan.  This country will never change.  All those Unnatural devils will be destroyed, every last one of them,” a guard hissed behind him.

“I won’t let any more people die!” Stephan howled.

Immediately he began to struggle, landing kicks and punches on any guard within his reach.  But soon they closed in on him, and six hands hindered his attacks.

“Fight all you want, but just like your parents, the rest of their kind will die.”

Shrieking with rage, Stephan shoved against the guards, pushing two of them to the ground.

“Get your filthy hands off of me!” he shouted as he shoved through the rest of the guards.  “I will not be stopped!” he shouted, even as new hands grabbed hold of him.

Suddenly, Stephan threw all of his weight forward into the guards and then spun out of their grip.  As his red-violet hair swung around him and settled down around his shoulders, he grinned menacingly.

“None of you will ever stop me,” he said coldly.

But, when he spun around to leave, he came face to face with the only person that wasn’t true of.  Inches away stood the prince; red and blue royal robes sparkling in the sun.

This was also the first mystery/crime novel I had read so far that was so deeply rooted in the gay community and addressed issues there.  Some issues were perhaps stretched into different things to fit the plot of the novel, but that is fiction, and it worked well regardless.

In general, Christopher Rice’s book is well-written and kept me involved all the way to the very last page.  He gives unique descriptions that easily draw you into his characters and his story.  Also, his characters themselves are original and interesting.  I enjoyed that it wasn’t the typical straight male character(s) who save any and all women from trouble.  Rice’s novel had many gay male characters, with various levels of strength and vulnerability.  There were also great fiery female characters who often showed more strength than the men around them.  All the different (and similar) characters really balanced each other out.

So, if you’re someone who enjoys unique mystery or crime novels, especially ones that can keep you guessing, I would certainly recommend this novel.  For anyone who might not like some parts, I will say that the novel’s a bit dark, and definitely deals with some controversial issues – pedophelia, drugs, etc.  But in my opinion, it’s well done, and absolutely worth the read.  I hope some of you read it as well and then tell me what you think!

Some of these topics are perhaps old news, but since they still infuriate me, I imagine they still mean something to a lot of you as well.  I have always loved to read vampire novels, and have even begun to write a few of my own at different times in my life.  So I definitely feel strongly about this immortal creatures.

Now, I do believe in an author’s creative license.  I never judged Stephenie Meyer by her choice to approach her vampires differently.  If they sparkle instead of burn in the sunlight, that’s her artistic license.  I personally enjoyed the idea of trying to look at a new reason for vampires to want to stay out of the sunlight.

What I think is that people sometimes focus on the wrong reasons for why Stephanie Meyer should not be held in such high esteem.  My problems are with her writing.  I made it through the first three books of her Twilight series without truly regretting my decision to read them.  I was intrigued by her character’s relationships, although I knew from the first page of her first book that her writing itself was certainly not among the best I had read.  At times, her writing is amateurish and is often repetitive.  And in her fourth book, her writing was destroyed for me entirely.  Everything interesting from her first three books was ruined by the fourth.  It was too perfect, too unrealistic – every single thing worked out perfectly in a “happy ending”.  A happy ending in general is fine, but she ruined each conflict by making everything work out without the slightest bit of trouble.  And besides that, almost every character of the first three books behaved out of character in the fourth book.  Jacob was the only character who stayed constant, and that was only because he wasn’t central to most of the story in that book.

Now, how anyone can even try to compare Stephenie Meyer to Anne Rice is beyond me.  I think that Rice surpasses her in every way.  The best thing that Stephanie Meyer had going for her in her books was her characters and their relationship with each other, but even that comes nowhere near the depth of Anne Rice’s characters.  People haven’t stopped talking about Lestat since first reading Interview with the Vampire, and I don’t think they will any time soon.  I don’t think that Stephanie Meyer should even be mentioned in comparison to Anne Rice.  The latter is so far out of her league, it is unbelievable.  If you really want to cling to the naive stories and flimsy characters of Meyer’s books, I certainly won’t stop you, but don’t think for a second that her writing is anywhere near the depth, intrigue, and gorgeous writing of Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles.

Finally, one of my other pet peeves is the Queen of the Damned movie.  It pains me every time that someone tells me how much they love this movie, or love Stuart Townsend as Lestat.  And I’ll make this clear – I don’t dislike Stuart Townsend as an actor, but I think that his portrayal of Lestat is completely off the mark (whether that is his fault, the director’s, or both).  I know some people have said they don’t like Tom Cruise as Lestat in the Interview with the Vampire movie.  After reading the book, I’ll admit Tom Cruise was not my own picture of Lestat either.  But, I thought that he pulled out many of the characteristics that truly represent Lestat to me.  And of course, that movie in general followed the story of the book much more closely than Queen of the Damned did.

In the Queen of the Damned, the only positive thing I can say is that Ailiyah acted quite beautifully.  She was the only part of that movie that seemed to fit anywhere into Anne Rice’s descriptions within her book.  So many other parts of the movie just had me shouting at my TV screen.  Vampires were flying around without abandon, one of the most crucial characters was cut out entirely, the entire ending was wrong, and Stuart Townsend was so far off from Lestat that it horrified me every second I watched him.  One of my biggest pet peeves?  They made Lestat a brunette!  How difficult would it have been to give Townsend a wig or dye his hair?  It may not seem important, but go back and read any of the books Lestat is in.  Almost every description of him mentions his blonde hair – it was his most important physical characteristic.  And even ignoring the physical side of things, suddenly instead of Lestat’s charm, wit, mystery, bravery, and darkness…we had some ridiculous rocker wanna-be with very few interesting characteristics.  How is it that one of the best written characters I’ve ever read could be represented so terribly?

Anyway, that is my rant for today.  Feel free to comment and tell me your own opinions on Anne Rice, Stephenie Meyer, and the book to movie problems, or anything else about this topic!

Twenty feet away was a small group of people huddled in a circle.  He spotted his target immediately: a slim redhead with a petite, curved form, and a cute pout on her lips.  He slipped back into the darkness of some nearby trees and watched as the group talked quietly.  The young redhead tossed her ponytail over her shoulders and placed her hands on her slim hips.  She pushed her lips into more of a pout, and furrowed her eyebrows.  A taller boy beside her reached out and ruffled her bangs playfully.  She shoved his hand away and squinted at him.  Her scowl lasted for a few moments before she burst into laughter.  Tossing her head back; her whole body shook with each laugh.  The man across the street waited patiently as some of her other friends began to leave.  He took a moment to concentrate on her outfit, not wanting to forget a single detail.  All her clothes were tight and seemed to squeeze her in just the right places.  The dark blue jeans only emphasized the curve of her hips and the tapering of her legs down to her very slim ankles.  Her feet were covered in plain black shoes with a thin strap over the top of each pale foot.  He looked up to her thick-strapped green shirt.  Her bare shoulders looked pink under the light of the street lamp, and matched the rosy pink of her cheeks.  The shirt dipped low on her chest and from across the street, he could make out the shadow of her deep cleavage easily.  He looked back up at her slightly rounded face as her laughter stopped.  She was alone on the street except for the boy who had ruffled her hair.  The stranger didn’t bother to look very long at the boy, since he was of no interest.  He just crept slowly out onto the street and silently moved toward the two teenagers.

The girl looked over just as a hand slammed over her mouth, and the stranger threw an arm around her waist.  He was about to leave when he felt a hand grab his cloak tightly.  Without letting the girl go, he spun his head around.  His eyes met a pair of pale bluish-gray eyes.  The boy holding him looked confused, and furious, but both those emotions gave way to fear when he saw the jet black eyes of the attacker.

“Let her go!” he said with less force than he had intended.

“If you value your life, you will let her go,” the attacker replied coolly.

The young boy met his friend’s wide eyes as tears began to trickle from them.  She appeared to be screaming, but the man’s hand over her mouth was muffling the sounds.  This time the boy grabbed the attacker with both hands and tried to tear him away from the girl.  The attacker barely budged and just smirked cruelly.

“That was a mistake,” he hissed.

The man’s hand whipped out, cracked the boy on the back of the head, and knocked him unconscious almost immediately.  Then he lifted the boy under one arm and the squirming girl under the other.  After glancing down at the two bodies once, he shot off down the dark street.

Just as she got up to leave, she heard quick footsteps approaching.  She turned toward the noise and was surprised by the handsomeness of the man approaching her.  Thick, dark hair and striking eyes topped a gorgeous body, all of which had her shivering in anticipation.

“Danielle?” his deep voice crooned as he continued to approach.

“…Yes,” she managed to gasp between shaky breaths.

Then suddenly he was at her side.  One of his large hands grabbed her slim waist as he smiled sexily down at her.

“My name is Joshua,” he murmured.

Even his voice enticed her.  She shuddered again, and Joshua smiled when he felt her shake against his arm.

“Let’s get you out of this cold air,” he whispered close to her ear.

Then Joshua confidently moved his arm up around Danielle’s shoulder and began to lead her down the path in the park.  While they walked, she glanced shyly over at him, trying to form an exact picture of him in her head, because she already knew that she’d be thinking of him long after he left.

As they came out onto the empty street, Danielle felt Joshua’s fingers slide down the front of her shoulder until just his fingertips brushed the bare skin at the top of her breast.  She couldn’t help but gasp softly, already feeling like she couldn’t wait any longer.

Joshua sensed her urgency, so he quickened his pace, pulling her along with him.  They half-jogged the last two blocks until Joshua pulled her to a stop in a parking lot in front of a small apartment building.  Even though she expected him to take her directly inside, he instead pulled her close to his chest while they were still in the parking lot.  His lips immediately pressed down on hers as his right hand began to quickly unbutton her dark blue coat.

When Danielle realized what he was trying to do, she pulled out of his arms and pulled her coat tightly around herself.  But, Joshua wasn’t going to let her stop him.  He grabbed her waist firmly and went back to removing her coat, pushing her hands away whenever she tried to stop him.  Soon the coat was open, and he quickly tugged it off of her and dropped it on the back of a nearby car.  Then he stared at her with lust in his eyes.

Danielle had promised to dress for the occasion, and she had been true to her word.  Under the coat she was only covered by a short black skirt and a bright red bra that already had Joshua’s heart racing.  Without waiting another second, Joshua pulled Danielle back in close to his chest and crushed her lips with his own.  His strong hands slid over her bare waist while his lips melded with hers.

Then, not able to bear the sexual tension any longer, Joshua grabbed Danielle’s jacket in one hand, her arm in the other, and pulled her quickly toward his apartment.  In less than a minute, he had pulled Danielle into a dark apartment and slammed the door behind them.  Not wasting any time fumbling for the light, he just dropped the jacket and tugged Danielle down the barely lit hallway.

He easily found his way to his kitchen, where a dim lamp gave off just enough light to let him see the beautiful woman in front of him.  With a sexy grin, he lifted her up into the air and dropped her down onto the counter behind her.  Then he pushed his way in between her knees and wrapped his arms around her.  Danielle curled her legs around his waist and leaned forward to nuzzle into his warm neck.

“I thought you’d never come back,” she whispered.  Her voice faltered.

He made a noise, like a hum, close to her ear.  The hairs stood up on the back of her neck, but she remained still.

“How long this time?  Hours?  Minutes?  Seconds?”  Her voice cracked again.

Without turning toward him, she could tell he was smiling.  She leaned back a little farther, afraid that suddenly the body behind her would disappear.

“I’m not leaving you.  I’m waiting for you,” he whispered.

Always the same words.  ‘I’m waiting for you’.  Always in that deep, silky voice that echoed in her head even when he was not with her.  She struggled to restrain herself from turning around.  She knew what seeing his face could do to her.

As if reading her mind, “Look at me,” he whispered.

She couldn’t.  Not this time.

“Please, look at me,” he begged.

She shook her head.

“I don’t have much longer.”

Her stomach turned at the gravity in his voice.  She turned slowly, glad that his hands moved with her and never left her body.  Once their eyes met, everything came rushing back to her at once…

This first one is an intro to/summary of a story I’ve been working on this past year.  Whether you like it or not, want to read more or not, leave me a comment and let me know!

Intro to “Eyes Must Match”:

There is a world where it is only natural for eye color to match hair color. Those with one or both eyes not matching their hair color are considered dangerous and called the Unnaturals.

In this world, three men are destined to come together. A rebellious man with red-violet hair and a dark past. A gentle, blue-haired scholar. And a strong, regal, blonde prince.

And, the prince has a secret. One of his eyes is a striking blue, not the pale yellow of his hair and other eye. He only escapes discovery by wearing a jeweled eye patch and claiming to be blind in one eye. Since he is prince, no one has ever questioned it. (Although some do suspect.)

Soon, the three men will be thrust together with one common goal: To protect the prince’s secret when a band of men begin to search out and kill all of the Unnaturals.